I don't know why this amuses me as much as it does, but here's an old post of Brant's that makes me laugh:

I'm tired of not being able to find stuff at the grocery store.

For some reason, they don't standardize the system. You'd think the Publix chain, for instance, here in Florida, would standardize the format, but they don't, which means we wind up walking 6.5 km to find the Tostitos, and then the search begins for Kleenex or whatever.

Admittedly, I kind of like the scavenger hunt vibe, but it discourages me from shopping, because I need to conserve my energy for my treadmill workouts.

So here's the plan: Lay out the stores from crunchy to soggy. As you walk in, crunchy stuff on the left, soggy stuff on the right. If something's kind of powdery, it would go in the middle with powdery-type stuff. (I've graphically illustrated this concept above for quick reference.)

Simple. Hard taco shells? On the far left. Soft tortillas? Toward the right.

Count Chocula? Crunchy. Gatorade? That's soggy.

I've heard the objections. "What about this, what about that...?" What about, say, detergent, Brant? What then?

Powdery. Unless it's got the Special Bleach Crystals, in which case it's more crunchy. "What about peanut butter?" Well, is it "extra crunchy"? That's a tip, folks.

Apples? Crunchy ones would be in the crunchy section. If they're kind of soggy -- hellooo? -- soggy section. This isn't hard.

Problem solved. You're welcome.

I know, it's random. But it amused me. Have a good weekend.