I'm personally opposed to bumper stickers. I don't have one and I never will. Especially not a religious or political one. Tell me this, when you see a bumper sticker that is stupid, offensive, or one that you disagree with, what kind of assumptions do you make about the driver? Eeeeeeeexactly. I would never want anyone making those kinds of assumptions about me. The way I see it is that bumper stickers are almost always oversimplifications of very complex subjects. And when they're not, it's because they actually do reveal how stupid you are.
As is, my life's philosophy seems to be, "Why use one word when I could use twelve?" So why in the world would I want to communicate in bumper stickers? It has always revealed a lack of thought and depth to me. Bumper sticker people seem to have not thought things through. They seem ready to exchange slogans for ideas. Am I being too harsh? What do you think of my assessment of bumper stickers? Am I a jerk? Oversensitive? What's the worst bumper sticker you've ever seen? Dumbest one? Most offensive one?
And would anyone care to explain this one?
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14 Cachinnations
I like bumber stickers...but not for me. It is a good way to laugh at people that cut you off or are stuck in Traffic with you. That way you don't get road rage!!
Posted on 6/21/2006
I agree with your general assessment. I have never had any bumper stickers on any of my vehicles, and fortunately married a woman who shares my feelings on the matter.
First of all, completely separate from the actual messages they convey, they make a car's exterior look "cheapened", in my opinion. I guess if you're driving a real beater that you don't care much about this is okay. But why would I want to try and keep my car looking clean and well-maintained, and then put a bunch of $3 stickers all over the back of it?
I lived in California for 15 years. A common site there is the hippy-mobile. This is usually a run-down little hatchback or station wagon of some sort, or a hippy style van (especially a Volkswagen Van) with as many bumper stickers as they could fit on any rearward-facing surface of the vehicle. And if they want to be really passe (which they usually are), it contains all the standard hippy slogans -- Visualize World Peace, Save the Whales, Practice Random Acts of Kindness and Senseless Acts of Beauty, Save the Baby Seals, Legalize Marijuana, Don't Drill In ANWAR, No Blood for Oil, Bush is Hitler, blah, blah, blah, etc...
And then there's the "pissing Calvin" that you linked to, that's everywhere in California (though it's usually more of a "window sticker" than "bumper sticker").
Another window sticker that I saw all over California but have not seen in Tennessee is the "family name" thing. This is predominantly a Mexican-pride thing, I think, because the name was always really large, written in elaborate fonts, and was typically Garcia, Rodriguez, Hernandez, etc.
I haven't noticed as many bumper stickers here in Tennessee. When I do, they're usually Bush/Cheney, or sometimes Kerry/Edwards stickers (Perhaps they're hard to remove once they're stuck to the vehicle? 'Cuz I've got news -- the election is over, folks).
Of course, we don't want to come across as mean-spirited here, Cach. You just know that there's going to be some regular visitor to this-here blog who has a bunch of these things on their vehicle and thinks they're just dandy. So be nice. :-)
I don't think that short, simple slogans in general are quite as bad as you seem to imply. But I do agree that a lot of shallowness of thought can often accompany a sloganeer mentality. If you've ever tried to debate with someone thoughtfully on a certain issue or subject, it's usually pretty apparent within the first five minutes whether they've actually thought their positions through, or simply glossed over them and accepted the first catchy-sounding thing that somebody said about them.
Posted on 6/21/2006
I know... I know! I don't want to be mean! And I don't want to offend any bumper sticker lover per se. I just don't get it! The 'Pissing Calvin' is foul. Some of the lovely ones I see down here in Texas are just disgusting, such as maybe my least favorite... EVER: 'No fags, no snitches, no fat bitches.' And I've never understood exactly how putting a 'W' or a 'Kerry/Edwards' sticker on one's car actually helps anything or accomplishes anything beyond ticking off 50% of people on the road!
If you're a reader here and also a bumper sticker person, please educate me or defend your position or whatever! I promise we'll be very nice. We're nice people here, right gang?
Posted on 6/21/2006
My personal favorite bumper sticker says, "Tailgate me and I'll flip a booger on your windshield."
Enough said.
Posted on 6/21/2006
I've seen some funny bumper stickers that are parodies of the common ones:
My Kid Beat Up Your Honor Student
Visualize Whirled Peas
Jesus is Coming! Look busy!
God was my co-pilot, but we crashed into a mountain and I had to eat him
Honk If Parts Fall Off
Posted on 6/21/2006
I don't have any bumper stickers, but I'm not necessarily opposed to them. Sometimes, they are funny, and when I'm sitting in traffic (which is everyday) they put a smile on my face. Obviously, rude ones are not to my liking, but I guess I don't feel bumper stickers are evil in and of themselves...it's how you use them.
Posted on 6/21/2006
Yes, they are tacky, but lots of them make me laugh, like the ones quoted by Chaotic Hammer. Everyone can use a good laugh, right?
Let's see...school stickers can be fun. I've started conversations with people based on them. "Hey, you've got a Clemson sticker, but you're in Texas. What are you doing here? Where are you from?, etc." The car was parked of course.
I never wanted a "saying" bumper sticker, but I finally gave in right before I left Texas. It does make the care look tackier. I agree. I guess I just got so tired of all the "God bless the U.S.A." and "God bless America" stickers. Sure, I want God to bless America but not just America. I want God to bless the entire world, and that seemed like an important concept to remember especially when the country is at war. So, "God Bless the World" was on the car for awhile. Yeah, I suppose it probably didn't change anybody's opinion, and maybe it pissed some people off. I was just hoping it might cause people to stop and think for a moment. Who knows...
Posted on 6/21/2006
As a rice, I'm offended by this bumpber sticker!
Posted on 6/21/2006
I think bumper stickers are just a way of expressing yourself. Like neon running board lights next to your spinners on your roached tires. I wouldn't dream of doing that to my mini van but I guess to each his own.
The Kerry stickers irritate me. Should it say, "I cry over spilt milk?". Not picking a fight just enough already. HAHA! You wouldn't dream of sporting a Nader sticker in July, now would you?
I laugh at the ones over here. The one of Calvin is gross. Whirrled peas is kinda cool.
Posted on 6/21/2006
I don't have any bumper stickers on my car either, but I do think it's funny when I see ones that say things like "The Religious Right is neither".
Posted on 6/21/2006
I have a bumper sticker.
Posted on 6/22/2006
Just kidding, I really don't.
Posted on 6/22/2006
Fancy, if you did have one, what would it say?
"Fancy pants are made to dance!"
"Ants in the pants? No, just fancy in the pants."
"Warning: In case of rapture this vehicle willFANCYPANTS!"
Posted on 6/22/2006
You should be a writer for these bumper stickers you so hate.
What a talent!
Posted on 6/22/2006